First, these strategies may appear to be about engaging others, however, when you read on, my hope is that you’ll have an epiphany as I had.
We all have what I prefer to think of as emotional enemies.
The biggest fear we face is worrying about what others think.
There are generally three classes, family, friends and everyone and everything outside that.
Those collectively give rise to the most formidable enemy of all, the enemy within.
As for the former group, when we must engage them, there are only a few rules of engagement. It’s quite easy.
When we lock horns with someone, we are open to be influenced by them; it’s like a 70’s disco dance.
Sure, it feels right at the time, but in the end, we feel ridiculous 😀
Following this, we feel foolish and ask ourselves disempowering questions that make us feel defeated.
Emotional energy is like booze, we must sober up to tango with class and confidence.
Learning to tango is more prudent and sophisticated.
The art of emotional tango is timeless and a critical skill to acquire.
When we know how to deal with people confidently without worrying about looking ridiculous, you’ve learnt to tango and importantly, pull the string in the realm of influence.
With the acquisition of these skills, the enemy within becomes an ally of the highest order restoring confidence, happiness and passion.
First, it’s critical to understand that there are battles and wars, and to battle on level ground is not how war is won.
We must be many moves ahead and sometimes appear to be the weaker warrior.
To many people, each battle is unexpected and improvised, which engenders insecurities and becomes emotionally costly drowning confidence, happiness and passion.
Some people use aggression and defensive reactions, and in doing so, leave themselves open. It forces predictability and improvisation, which can only take you from one battle to the next.
It’s critical to understand that in this predictable emotional state, each battle is waged from the crud defensive circuits in the primitive brain. Hence predictability.
To have a decided advantage, your tactics and strategy must originate from the higher functioning areas of human achievement, your intellect; and its power arises from the cortex.
Once you feel an overflow of emotion, the foolish enemy within takes control, its crud strategy is to fight or flee.
A word of caution, if you or your target engage with aggression, it engenders the ugliest of human emotions such as resentment and revenge.
It becomes a battle of the ego, not the intellect.
To win, we must have a resource of intellectual tactics at your disposal, be many moves ahead, and have all angles of attack covered.
Insight: Have a POOL of intellectual resources at your disposal.
Depending on your target, you draw from the bag of tactics, the tactics assemble the strategy, and the strategy builds the plan for the confident engagement.
Sometimes it may appear to your target that they’re winning, but they’re not.
This is a tactic that brings down their defences by employing a pseudo submit tactic; they feel respected and superior, you’ve successfully pulled the wool over their eyes.
Using the pseudo submit tactic, you control the outcome because they falsely believe they’ve won, but the reality is you’ve broken their defence and control the next move.
For your target, they battle with aggression driven by the primitive need to control you and be right.
But for you, you’re now driven by the crowning achievement of human abilities, the intellect.
Intellectually you realise that some battles must outwardly appear to have been lost, even to onlookers; however, the defence of your target is now down, the war you’re waging isn’t equal, you’re on higher ground confidently pulling the strings.
There are many more tactics that we can build strategies and deploy.
This bestows you with supreme confidence moving forward, and having the luxury of no concern over emotional hurt feels profound and powerful.
And the forth adversary, the enemy within, becomes an ally of the highest order restoring confidence, happiness and passion.
Would you like to learn such skills in detail?